Friends are an important part of any person's life. How they are needed in difficult times and how nice it is to share your joy with them! But it happens that your friend has a difficult period: either just a bad mood, or depression. Who if not a close person should be there at this moment to help or at least to cheer up!
Instructions
Step 1
If you cannot help your friend solve the problem that upsets and worries him, do so so that it is not the reality around him that changes, but his attitude towards it. If you cannot influence the objective, change the subjective.
Cheering up a friend doesn't necessarily mean cheering. The main thing is to switch, to distract a person from his sad thoughts, to get him out of those labyrinths in which he wanders alone. Method one - invite him somewhere. You can go to the cinema or a nightclub, you can sit in a cafe or bar, you can get out into nature, depending on what he likes. The minimum task is to get a person out of the house and get distracted from everyday life. In a circle of friends, in a place where people relax and have fun, this is the easiest thing to do.
Step 2
If your friend is a sociable person, and you will not surprise or delight him by going to the movies, offer to do something new. What you have never done. It can be anything that will bring completely new emotions and impressions. Travel abroad, horseback riding, hot air ballooning, bungee jumping or going to the circus. There are a lot of options. Think about what will trigger an adrenaline rush, excitement, or hilarious laugh from your friend. And there is no need to be afraid that he will not like it. Even if this happens, deep down he will appreciate your impulse.
Step 3
Unfortunately, it happens that a person does not want to go anywhere for anything. He sits in his apartment, like in a mink, he feels bad there, but it is warm and calm. He doesn't want to make an effort to get out of his sadness or does not believe that this is possible. Then you need to go for the trick. Say that a ticket to a theater or a concert is missing, say that you are afraid to go to a new company without it. Or simply turn the situation around by telling a friend that you need his help, that everything is falling out of your hands and you want to get out somewhere and relax. It is common for good people to readily run to help a friend, but to show complete detachment and laziness in solving their own problems, alas. So it might work.
Step 4
Sometimes a person is so immersed in his problem that even when he comes with you to a movie or cafe, he cannot be distracted from his sad thoughts. He seems to be sitting opposite you, but his thoughts are far away, his gaze is directed nowhere, and no matter how hard you try, you cannot stir him up. He gives you monosyllabic answers or just politely assent, not even delving into what he is told. You will have to be firm. Sit next to me, push to the side: "What's the matter with you?" The tone and, as they say, the terminology you choose, because no one knows your friend better than you, and you have long developed your own special language of communication. The task is to shake the person up.
Perhaps this violation of idyllic longing and detachment will not be to your friend's taste. He may even be offended by you, do not be afraid! The main thing is to awaken new emotions in him.
Step 5
The depth of the trauma or the severity of the problems can absorb a person so strongly that it will not be possible to bring him out of this state by means of "light contact". If you want to help him, you have to go through pain. You will have to pull the problem out of the person, ask him questions, even inconvenient ones, ask for details, forcing him to describe all the facets of feelings and emotions that your friend experienced at these moments. By pulling the pain to the surface, forcing a person to speak, to admit to you and to yourself that something unpleasant or even terrible has happened to him, you help the person.
On the one hand, you will help him understand all the intricacies of his own feelings. On the other hand, forcing him to relive the past, you will hurt him, but it will already be a little weaker. Then again. And further. And after so many repetitions of this experience, the pain will subside.
If during this process your friend starts to cry - hug him, do not hesitate. And let him not be shy about his tears. Let him feel your warmth and support. And make it clear that tears in his situation are normal and even positive, because they bring a little relief.
